Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize