whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Randomize