Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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