already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize