she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
You made out with two different species that night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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