I never want to see another naked old woman again.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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