Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize