Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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