Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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