An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
He did a backflip because drugs
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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