I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
i think my mom watched the whole time
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize