so that wasnt chicken after all
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
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