wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
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I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
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I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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