I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize