Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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