I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
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