Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
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