We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Never underestimate the power of titties
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize