My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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