Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
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