I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Randomize