hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
She said her name was "party"
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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