Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize