Texts From Last Night

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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  This guy has a retainer. We're golden.

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  (902): This guy has a retainer. We're golden. http://tfl.nu/im2l
  Replies (3) Good night (707) Bad night (1909) Order T-Shirt
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..

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  (651): You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold.. http://tfl.nu/rd4a
  Replies (18) Good night (5671) Bad night (548) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete

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  (717): just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete http://tfl.nu/yzxp
  Replies (28) Good night (4378) Bad night (1613) Order T-Shirt
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  (407): View more from Florida

  at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions

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  (407): at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions http://tfl.nu/ea5m
  Replies (20) Good night (4609) Bad night (772) Order T-Shirt
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.

  (1-403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Your godly.

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  (403): Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation. (1-403): Your godly. http://tfl.nu/7li2
  Replies (13) Good night (4058) Bad night (934)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.

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  (609): That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me. http://tfl.nu/oade
  Replies (4) Good night (848) Bad night (3344) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..

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  (512): At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso.. http://tfl.nu/wlhb
  Replies (12) Good night (2171) Bad night (777) Order T-Shirt
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  (707): View more from California

  I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister

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  (707): I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister http://tfl.nu/vdmj
  Replies (7) Good night (2354) Bad night (735) Order T-Shirt
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.

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  (321): Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen. http://tfl.nu/nu81
  Replies (6) Good night (2147) Bad night (510)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest

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  (724): Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest http://tfl.nu/2gbs
  Replies (7) Good night (817) Bad night (544) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...

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  (215): five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ... http://tfl.nu/nz34
  Replies (5) Good night (1113) Bad night (312) Order T-Shirt
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.

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  (317): Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck. http://tfl.nu/efut
  Replies (6) Good night (467) Bad night (588) Order T-Shirt
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?

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  (321): let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal? http://tfl.nu/87r8
  Replies (11) Good night (837) Bad night (281)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..

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  (206): She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out.. http://tfl.nu/vlup
  Replies (3) Good night (469) Bad night (450) Order T-Shirt
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory

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  (216): After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory http://tfl.nu/ao8l
  Replies (6) Good night (711) Bad night (217) Order T-Shirt

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