the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize