I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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