she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
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She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
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Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
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