to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize