try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
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For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
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