Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
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Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
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Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
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