mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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