someone get that fucking seahorse.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Randomize