She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
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