yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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