I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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