You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
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