I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
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