The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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