My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
And the cops told us we were all naked.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize