so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send help, water and tortillas.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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