She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize