He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
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