Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I deserve this hangover.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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