there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize