We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize