He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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