they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
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There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
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Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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