Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize