I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Randomize