I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize